Tag Archives: sutures

Urgent Doctors. Silly doctors.

So annoying! I self harmed this morning, because I needed to go out to appointments and such, by myself. But I didn’t realise I had run out of suture material! So I had to ring up my doctors office and see if I could get an appointment. They had no doctors in, so they sent me to the urgent doctors instead.

I hate going anywhere to get stitched up, especially places like the urgent doctors or emergency department, because they don’t know me and immediately freak out about my mental state. The doctor tried to ask me a hundred questions about why I self harmed, whats been going on lately for me, am I feeling suicidal, was this cut a suicide attempt blah blah blah. All the while, I am trying to convince her that its all normal for me, the only reason I am here is that I ran out of sutures, that I saw my team today, and they know about my self harming etc etc. But she was still all panicky.

They rung the crisis team, but thankfully I didn’t have to see them or anything. Because that would have meant waiting for ages and ages all for a very pointless few words with them. I got let home as long as I put the crisis number in my phone in front of her. Whew.

It was relatively amusing after the doctor had finished suturing, and left the nurse to dress it. The nurse was amazed that all the other sutures in my legs had been done by me. She said “how did you learn how to suture so beautifully??!”, and after putting some steri strips on parts of the wound that were not completely held together by the sutures, she whispered – “I think you are way better at suturing than the doctor!”. I’m not gonna lie, it felt pretty good 😛

So anyway, after a very long and tiring, and to be honest quite stressful day – I am finally home. Completely had it, and ready to blob and watch The Big Bang Theory.

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Confessions in the doctors office..

Today I had to fess up to my self harm and self suturing! 

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I was really nervous about explaining this to my doctor. I was imagining she would totally freak and tell me off for a.) self harming, and b.) Suturing myself! 

I started by explaining to her that I’ve been self harming a bit more lately, and that I really hate going to ED, so I started suturing myself up. She didn’t show too much shock visibly which was a relief, but she did start then saying – “well we would prefer you to come here for us to stitch you up if you self harm”. But I then explained that I usually end up self harming late at night, so it wouldn’t be possible. So she suggested if I hate ED so much and it was after hours, I should go to the urgent doctors. My begrudging look must have shown quite clearly. I was like – “i know its bad, but i try and keep everything as sterile as possible and… etc etc etc” 

So she had me show her the cuts. Her reaction to this was priceless! She was majorly taken aback, and with surprise in her voice, was like “did you really do this?? Flip, that’s amazing! I couldn’t have done a better job myself! Wow. Ok then, seeing as this is a really good job, I can’t recommend that you do this, but just come to us if you need it looked at ok?”

Whoop whoop so now i feel like its probably ok, and that I can just go to the doctors for it if I think its infected or something. Yay what a relief. And now I also feel quite good about myself, because clearly im good at being self sufficient and able to suture myself!

My doctor has such a good attitude. I like how she lets me in on the information, and decisions about myself and my treatment, instead of most other doctors who like to keep you in the dark!

Now my only worry for the rest of the day is this darn interview about whats on my police check! Wish me luck!

Playing doctor/ Survivalist / SHTF practice!

It’s one of those don’t try this at home type scenarios… but I like to break the rules! Here’s my first ever attempt at suturing myself. Well… first attempt at suturing in general actually 😛 

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I think I did a pretty good job, and it’s given me faith that in a SHTF scenario I would be able to confidently suture myself or someone else up to a reasonable standard, and in a safe manner! Now, I know that in general you should go get a doctor to assess a wound and treat it. I would still recommend this to all of you. I just happen to hate going to the ED, and like to do it myself if I can.

What a rebel.